Ramblings and Rants

It's Friday.  I'm dead tired.  I'm sitting on my balcony in the dark listening to the kompa music at the resto bar (aka shack) next door. I don't know why I'm even bothering to attempt a blog post when I'm this tired, but I realize I've been neglecting my blog.  I've been told that I have a lot of devoted followers....so this is for you.  So, try to follow my scatter brained random update.

Let's see......This is probably too much information, but I've been battling stomach issues for the past two weeks.  Monday was the worst day.  I got to school and shortly after arriving started vomiting and having diarrhea (worse than the previous week) so I could't teach that day.  Thankfully, my paraprofessional covered my classes for me, and I took a motorcyle home.  Pray that these issues resolve soon!

Julie, my roommate, has a small motorcyle.  She let me take it to Jubilee last Sunday to practice riding it on the salt flats.  Since then, she has been letting me borrow it every now and then when she is not using it.  It's quite an adventure maneuvering around the other zillion motocycles on the streets, but it is such a feeling of freedom being able to drive myself around rather than rely on tap-taps and moto taxis. Since I have no means of transportation, I have to pay to ride a tap-tap or take a motorcycle to and from school each day.  My house is a couple miles from the school. I would love to be able to buy my own one day, but at this point in time I do not have any extra funds to do so.  Money is very tight for me this year.  I hate asking others for money, however if any of you feel moved to support me, it would be a huge blessing!  I cannot do any of this without the support of all of you!

School has been difficult...the most difficult job I've ever had.  However, it has hands down been the best things I've ever done.  Daily, I am faced with crazy mind boggling issues that one would never imagine facing.  But, I've never felt more like "I'm in the exact right place."  I want to rip my hair out, scream, cry, punch something, hide, run away, and give up...BUT I've never felt more at peace and more content than I do since moving here.

The last thing that I want to do is make this place sound unpleasant.  Because the reality is that I love it SO MUCH.  And I love the people here more than words.  I know in my heart that if Jesus were on Earth right now, he would sit himself down in Jubilee with these very people.  BUT with that being said, it is stinkin' hard.  Jubilee is a poverty stricken ghetto.  The people here have hardened hearts.  They fight.  The argue.  They yell.  They throw rocks at each other.  They steal.  They lie.  They try to use us for money.  They don't respect each other.  Everyday, I feel like as we are teaching the kids how to treat each other with love and respect, and at the same time their parents are teaching the opposite at home.  It is frustrating...it breaks my heart....it makes me angry.  During our staff meeting this morning one of the Haitian teachers said, "Teaching the kids is like a rope.  We tie the rope at school and at home the parents are untying it."  I loved what Lala said in response, "Yes, you are right.  That's exactly what it is like and its hard to deal with.  And, it seems like nothing we do is making a difference.  In school we teach the kids not to fight, but at home the parents are teaching the kids to fight.  So, if we want it to stick with them, we just have to teach them not to fight, MORE than the parents teach them to fight.  And one day, they will get to choose which of the two choices is better."

I'm doing my best, but my conclusion is that we need more Jesus in this place.  I don't want you to imagine the people in Jubilee as terrible people.  They are people just like you and I, and they have all lived though hell.  They are my friends.  We laugh.  We joke.  We work together.  We share stories.  We are doing this life together.  But, its hard.  It is so hard.  Please pray for that.  Pray for more Holy Spirit.  More Jesus.  Pray for an overflowing abundance of peace and love for one another in Jubilee.

I warned you that this was going to be a scatter brained post.  I don't know where to fit this in. But, I want to share this little gem of a story:

One of my beautiful, smart students, Lorisena was threatening students yesterday.  Several children were tattling on her for it.  April (the recipient of the tattling) assumed she was just threatening to beat them up after school (which is a very typical from our students).  However, that was NOT what she was threatening to do.  She was threatening to write their names on a piece of paper and throw it on a red car.  "What the...?" you might ask.  Why is that bad????  Well apparently in Voodoo, when your name is written on paper and it touches something red, you get a curse put on you.  Suddenly, it all makes sense.  Lorisena's father is a Voodoo priest.  I know her father.  He is a kind sweet looking older man.  I like him a lot.  But, he is a Voodoo priest.  All I can say is, "Seriously?!  For real?!"  What the heck are we supposed to say in response to that????  How do we punish her in this situation??  Never in my life did I imagine myself dealing with stuff like this and living in a place like this.  It actually makes me laugh.  Sometimes I take a step back and look at what I do on a daily basis and I just laugh.  My life NOW cannot possibly be any more different than it was three years ago.  But I love it.